text: Zamzam
pic: from Hellblazer:
Dangerous Habits
She's on the floor panting. I ask her what the hell is going on. She gives me the crooked evil eye. I've been warned. But I never listen. I never listen until somebody cuts me in the head with a CD-case. We tumble out into the snow. It is cold. The blood on my neck is warm and gushy. She tries to bite me. I try to keep my distance. She smells sweet. Her body tight and hard.

And then I can't hold it back. It rushes through me like a mad gorilla. Twelve fucking years of frustration and disappointment. Anger and fake happy smiles. It needs to come out. It has to come out. Now. Now at once. It knows it. We both know it. It can't wait.

I push her face into the snow. She struggles, but she can't come up. I chuckle as her attempts weakens and all of a sudden she's not moving at all. I must have held her like that for several minutes before I realize she needs air. I run away trough the woods, trough the field and the snow.

The clerk avoids eye contact and refuses even a smile. She packs my things. Puts them gently into a bag. I pay. A small black ant quickly crosses the desk. She returns my change. I take my bag. We haven't said a word. The signal from the door breaks the silence as I leave. And that's when I see my face. What the...

Who are you great evil and what am I? Who tells you what to do and what to say? Who is whispering in your ear... murder? Murder? Murder! Hard is good and life is good. And I just know it's time for moving on.

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